There is a scene in the show TV show "Nikita" where Nikita is confronted by her own commitments (titled "True Believer"). There is a scene in it that helps me see what a follower of Christ must do. Quite simply a Christian must first accept grace in the deep recesses of their soul. Then obedience will follow but also a life that follows Christ with a covenantal understanding/experience of God's love.

Ravi Zacharias (www.rzim.org) stated "Half goodness is the essence of everything bad" How true is it when we crawl through  our faith and not realize its of no gain to live as a slave. To have two masters and live in two worlds. To live is Christ and to die is gain. We must give Christ our whole lives, put our heads down and run the race until we die; never looking back. It is only then that the world will be changed. It is only then that we will be changed freed men.

Quite simply as a result of dying to self and living for Christ we will be violent lovers. Prodigal love will fill the earth. A love as sacrificial as the Cross. How blameless is such a love that only points to him.


Nikita: Season 3 Ep 3 "True Believer"

Nikita: She asked me if I was willing to die for division. I didn't have an answer.
Alex: Nikita that's because you spent so much time trying to take this place down.
Nikita: exactly and in that time no one thought I could be stopped because I thought I was stronger or faster....... It had nothing to do with that.
Alex: Then What Was it?
Nikita: I was committed. I was more committed than my enemies. I believed. If I lose that....

Hopeless


Hopeless
it hurts
pointless my bitter end
disire confounded by wind

will I ever win?
love constantly lost
will my ship cast wind
probably not
I drown in faulty
slipping in my own underwear

perfectly sloppy
this is my despair
desire

repeatedly wonky
why do I come alongside fear
dissapear
can no one gift me pity
I have enough for the lot

burdening my hurt
loft swings as master
my home made master
singleness unlike stot

wading for a while
looking for mercy
painfully turning towards grace and eternal savings

crawling toward dawns twilight

Meshed

In your face in your face
I write this line
lines
so rhetoric-al your brain
a pill
pain-full your idiot-synchronicity
provincial non intellectual
when glory inside

I miss you

so these I write verbally masturbate
in your face
using my insides as bait
but wait
so senile your mental aptitude
alone my words will date

but I love you

too late Ill not wait
my lines drop like anchors
will I sink
alone in this ocean
in my mind you'll never find me

perhaps you're honest even

but I let go anyway
dead and awake